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Retranslated Scenes - The Recruits at Creed's Mansion

Meeting Karna and Eric at Desktop Kingdom

Screenshot of the japanese version, with Bowie talking to Karna at Desktop Kingdom.

Original text	My Translation	Localization text
ひょっとして。。。　あなたたち　そとのせかいの　人たちじゃない！　どうして　こんなところにいるの？	Could it be... You're from the outside world, aren't you!? Why are you in this place?	Are you from the outside? Why did you come here?
まあ！　まちがって　つくえの国に　まぎれこんで　しまったというの！　こんなとこに　いけはいけないわ	My! You got mixed up with Desktop Kingdom by mistake! You can't stay in this place.	Ah, a mistake. I see.
そうだ！　だったら　ポンペイ王に　そうだんして　みたらいいわ！　きっと　力になってくれるわよ	I know! You should consult with King Ponpei! I'm sure he'll help you.	I suggest you see King Ponpei. He's a good man.

Screenshot of the japanese version, with Bowie talking to Eric at Desktop Kingdom.

Original text	My Translation	Localization text
私は　伝説の剣をさがすたびで　たまたま　かざんのふんかに　まきこまれてしまったのだ。。。	I was on a journey searching for a legendary sword, and ended up caught in the volcanic eruption...	I was there during the disaster. I was looking for the legendary sword.
これもまた　うんめいなのだろうが　ここで　時の間のさまよい人として　生きていくのは　むねんだ。。。	Maybe it was fate, but it's vexing to live on as someone lost in time...	I hate it here!

Meeting Tyrin and Randolf at Floor World

Screenshot of the japanese version, with Bowie talking to Tyrin at Floor World.

Original text	My Translation	Localization text
私たちは　このいじげんのへやから　ぬけだすために　下けりてきましたが　北東のあなには　魔物がいます	We came down here to escape the different dimension that is this room, but there are devils in the northeast hole.	We came down here to escape, but devils live in the tunnel...
やつらは　とても　どうもうです　これならば　つくえの国から　はなれなければ　よかった。。。	They're very ferocious. Had I known, I wouldn't have left Desktop Kingdom...	They're too ferocious! I'm gonna stay in Floor World.

Screenshot of the japanese version, with Bowie talking to Randolf at Floor World.

Original text	My Translation	Localization text
なんだって？　クリード様のへやに　いきたい！　お前！　しょうきでいうのか？	What did you say? You want to see Mr. Creed!? C'mon! Are you right in the head?	You want to see Creed? Are you serious?!
北東のあなから　行けるらしいが　恐ろしい生き物が　いるからなあ　やめた方が　いいと思うぞ。。。	Seems the hole to the northeast leads to him, but there's some fearsome creatures there. I think you should give up...	A hole in the wall leads to Creed, but don't use it!

Choosing a character when leaving Creed's Mansion

Screenshot of the japanese version, with Bowie talking to Karna at Creed's Mansion.

Original text	My Translation	Localization text
私は　そうりょのツィッギー　年よりの多いポンペイでは　わかい方じゃないかしら。。。	I'm the priest Karna. Ponpei is full of elderly people, maybe I'm young for that place...	I'm KARNA, a priest. I think I'm rather young for my profession...
あの。。。とざされたところから　かいほうされるチャンスなのよ！　おねがい！　私をつれてって？	Say... This is my chance to escape from this closed off place! Please! Take me along?	I don't want to stay in this awful place forever. Choose me!
	If refused:
あっそう　つめたいんだ！　いじ悪いうんなら　いいわよ！	Oh really, how cold of you! Fine then, if you're this nasty!	You...snot nose!

Screenshot of the japanese version, with Bowie talking to Eric at Creed's Mansion.

Original text	My Translation	Localization text
私は　騎士のエルリック。。。　昔は　ある国の城主として　魔法の剣を　さがしていた	I am the knight Eric... In the past I was a lord in a certain country, and sought a magical sword.	I'm ERIC, a knight. I was looking for a magic sword.
クリード殿の　ねがいとあれば　この力！　かさねばなるまい！　さあ　私を　えらんでくれぬか？	If Mr. Creed so desires, I must lend you my strength! So, won't you choose me?	I would do anything for Mr. Creed! Please choose me.
	If refused:
ウーム。。。　それは　ざんねん　きみたちの　こんごのぼうけんに　さち多きことを　いのるとしよう	Umm... That's disappointing. I'll pray for good fortune in your journey.	What a pity...then, I wish happiness to all of you.

Screenshot of the japanese version, with Bowie talking to Tyrin at Creed's Mansion.

Original text	My Translation	Localization text
私は　まどうしのパイパー　ポンペイ国の　インテリとして　魔法を　けんきゅうしてきた	I am the mage Tyrin. I was an intellectual of Ponpei, researching magic.	I'm TYRIN, a mage. I studied magic in Ponpei.
仲間とわかれることになるが　私の力が　生かせるならば！どうか　私をつれて行ってほし	I'll have to leave my comrades, but if my power can be useful to you, then please take me along!	I'll miss my friends, but if I can be of help, I'll go with you!
	If refused:
私の　あやつる魔法が　なにかの　おやくにたてると　思ったんですけどねぇ。。。	I think my magic would be useful to you, though...	My magic could've been a great help to you.

Screenshot of the japanese version, with Bowie talking to Randolf at Creed's Mansion.

Original text	My Translation	Localization text
けっ　どうぜ　ワシのことを　大ざけのみの　ドワーフじじいと　あなどって　みているだろう？	Tch, you're looking down on me like I'm some drunkard old dwarf, aren't you?	Hee, hee... I'm not only a dwarf, I'm RANDOLF.
ところが　どっこい　戦士仲間で　さい強の　ドンゴさまとはワシよ　どうだ　ワシを仲間にしないか？	Well, think again, I'm the great Randolf, strongest warrior of my group. So, why not take me on your team?	I'm known as the strongest warrior of my people.
	If refused:
ちぇっ　やっぱりダメか。。。　いいさ　しばらくは　このまま　ここに　いることにするぜ	Tsk, really...? Fine then, I'll be staying here like this for some time.	Tut! OK, I have a comfortable life here.

Returning to the wrecked mansion

Screenshot of the japanese version, with Bowie talking to Eric at the damaged mansion.

Original text	My Translation	Localization text
私たちの　いたへやがこわれて　あっという間に　このとおり　もとの大きさに　もどっていた	The room we were in was ruined, and in a flash we returned to our original sizes as you can see.	I really want to find the legendary magic sword...
多くの者は　表にとびだしたが　私は　どこにいってもいいものやら　とほうに　くれているところだ	A lot of people ran off outside, but I don't know where I should go.	But I can't do there if I'm stuck here.
もしよければ　この私を　つれていって　もらえまいか？	If not a bother, could you take me with you?	May I join your force?
	If refused:
そうか。。　それならば　でんせつの剣さがしのたびを　さいかいする　ことにしよう

Screenshot of the japanese version, with Bowie talking to Tyrin at the damaged mansion.

Original text	My Translation	Localization text
戦うものおとが　したと思ったら　まわりの物が　ちいさくなていって　まさか　じぶんが大きくなったとはね	I thought I heard sounds of battle, then everything around me became smaller, or rather, I grew bigger somehow.	I'm not sure why, but I'm free.
しかし　スキにしていいといわれても　私の知っている　せかいでもないし　私を　つれていってくれませんか？	But even if you said I can do as I please now, this is no longer the world I know. Could you take me with you?	Can I join your force?
	If refused:
私の　あやつる魔法が　なにかの　おやくにたてると　思ったんですけどねえ。。。	I think my magic would be useful to you, though...	My magic could've been a great help to you.

Screenshot of the japanese version, with Bowie talking to Randolf at the damaged mansion.

Original text	My Translation	Localization text
気がついたら　このとおり　もとの大きさに　もどってて　おどろいたって　わけなのさ	I was surprised when I realized I was back to this original size of mine.	I was surprised to find I had returned to my original size!
いまさら　おっぽりだされても　べつに　なにをするわけでもなし！　どうだ　おれを仲間にしないか？	It's too late to be released now, I have no clue what I should do! So, how about adding me on your team?	What should I do now? I can go anywhere... maybe...with you?
	If refused:
ちぇ　やっぱりダメか。。。　いいさ　しばらくは　このまま　ここに　いることにするぜ	Tsk, really...? Fine then, I'll be staying here like this for some time.	Tut! OK, I have a comfortable life here.

[imagine a screenshot of karna here i don't have one yet because lol you think i ever skipped her on the first visit?]

Original text	My Translation	Localization text
ああ　そとのせかいのくうきって　なんて　おいしいのかしら！　これで　じゆうになれたのね	Ah, the air in the outside world is so fresh! With this, I'm free now.	I'm free! Fresh air smells so good!
でも　いきなり　そういわれても　クリード様も　かってよね！　そうだ　あなたをついていこうか？	But saying that all of a sudden, Mr. Creed just does whatever he wants! Oh, I know, maybe I'll go with you?	Where should I go? Hey, may I go with you?

Notes:

There is an oversight here for when you pick any of these characters, where their portrait and voice sound don't go away before the "joined the force" message, as if the message was still part of their dialogue.
Tyrin and Randolf's lines are pretty much the same for refusing them the first and second time, but they're still different strings due to veeeeeery minor stylistic differences, like using え instead of ぇ for an extended "e" sound. For a game that wanted to save as much cartridge space as possible and reuses a lot of strings between different dialogue lines, this is pretty weird.

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